WLS and Makeup

It's no secret, I am obsessed with makeup.  I love how it transforms your creativity into beauty.  It's such an awesome tool to build confidence and express ones self.  I'm. A. Fan.

It's also no secret that I got weight loss surgery (WLS) back in September.  I've lost 90lbs and am feeling the best I ever have.

So what does WLS  and makeup have in common?  CONFIDENCE.

I have never felt as confident as I have the past few months.  My face is thinner and my eyes have widened.  I have changed up my makeup routine based on these new features and can finally do my makeup the way I have always wanted to!

I am obsessed with eyeliner.  I love a dark smokey eye and super dramatic winged liner.  I had a difficult time rocking this look when I was heavier because my eyes were small.  Using liner on your waterline can sometimes make your eyes look even smaller.  Now that my eyes have widened, I wear eyeliner in my waterline everyday!

Earthquake on my water line! 

Winged liner and hockey! 

One of the best eyeliners for this is the Marc Jacobs Highliner.  I have it in Mist Me, Earthquake and .  Blacquer.  I LOVE IT! It is so creamy and stays on your waterline all day.  It's also great from smudging on your eyelids for that smokey rockstar look.  They have so many colors too, I can't wait to experiment with more dramatic colors. 

The more weight I lose, the more confidence I get!  I can't wait to be able to feel comfortable to express myself in all aspects of life.  





I received the Marc Jacobs Highliner in Mist Me and Earthquake complimentary for testing purposes.  All reviews are my own, this product is awesome! @Influenster @MarcBeauty #Highliner #contest 

"Bariatric Surgery is the Easy Way Out!!" - Said No One Who Has Had It

If someone ever says that to me, I am going to slap the shit out of them.


I'm guilty, I used to think this.  Back when I was "losing weight the normal way."  I thought that I would beat obesity by myself without needing this and those who got it may not have tried the normal way.  UMMMMMMMMMM no.

This entire journey has been a crazy mind f*ck that has not been easy.


The preop diet was fine, to me that was like a normal diet I have been on my entire life just now needed to focus on protein.  Oh the joy.  It's post op that has been hard!!

First off, it's a common misconception that just because you have weightloss surgery that the pounds just melt off.  That's not true.  We have to work just as hard to lose weight as people who have not had surgery, we just have a little more luck with the numbers (usually).  I eat healthy every day, high protein, low carb. I track everything. I workout, I track that too. I drink a crap ton of water, also always tracked.  I have a fitbit and try to reach 10k steps a day, tracked on an app.  After all that, I have lost 23-24lbs since surgery on 9/7/16.  Maybe it would be more than if I did all those things without having surgery, maybe it wouldn't be.  But in that time period I have worked my ass off and have followed all of the "rules", tried my very best.

I can honestly say I am working harder now than I ever have before! Physically and mentally. I can't eat shit on a cheat day, in fact, I can't even have one.  Pizza...nope, not unless it's on a piece of eggplant or in a damn baked wonton (no I'm not complaining, they are good actually).  If I want something, I can't just have it. I can't "track it and move on." (love for all my weight watchers peeps).  So that's been a mental battle sometimes but overall I have been successful winning those and avoiding the cravings.  I just try to alter whatever I want into something I can have. AKA homemade healthy burger, no bun.  

There have been days/weeks where I have lost nothing.  I hit a stall for 2 weeks where the scale didn't budge.  Also right now, I have weighed the same for 4 days.  Think about how mentally f*cked up that is...to work your ass off, eat like 500-700 calories a day, burn most of those calories by working out, pay $$$$$ for surgery and still not lose weight.  It's discouraging, but you have to trust the process, which is what I tell myself everyday.  Marathon, not a sprint.


So what's the difference between me and someone who hasn't had surgery? I have 5 little scars and a tiny ass stomach inside my body.  It's the same journey, just this time it will work!! (Eventually)

SURPRISE!!!

So I think it's time to share my LIFE CHANGING decision with everyone!


On September 7th, I got VSG surgery!  For those of you who don't know what that is, I basically had weightloss surgery to have half my stomach removed.




This wasn't an impulse decision, it was something I was researching and considering for awhile.  I have been big my entire life and I haven't had much success.  Losing weight is the HARDEST thing I have ever had to do and I decided that it was time to get some permanent help!

My journey started May 2016 where I went to an information session about weightloss surgeries.  You learn everything from what the surgery entails, the risks and how your life will forever change.  I made an appointment with the surgeon as soon as possible to get the process started.  Everyone is different due to insurance regulations, there are different processes you have to take based on what will be approved by them.  For me, I had to have 4 months consecutive office visits with the surgeon, a psych eval, EKG, upper GI xray, nutritionist visits and a 90day supervised exercise program.  I was able to finish everything by mid August and my surgery was scheduled right after that!

Everything was pretty simple, the 90 day exercise program was the most annoying. I had to go every week to a physical therapy place where they gave me workouts to do.  10 mins on the treadmill, 10 mins on the bike, 10 mins on the arm bike, weight lifting and other cardio exercises.  It was like $70 a pop so it got expensive.  It was also annoying because I felt like the people there weren't very nice to me but whatever. Glad that is done!

I was very nervous once surgery came closer.  I had lost about 23lbs since May on the preop diet.  That included just eating healthier and changing some habits that helped you transition into life after surgery.  The most significant change would be the protein shakes.  I had one every day for breakfast and still do.  Other changes was just to focus on protein and less carbs, not too bad!  I did have many food funerals though, which included pizza, burgers, fries and all that JUNK!

On the day of surgery I weighed in at 308lbs.

Surgery for me was pretty easy! I feel like I had a textbook experience.  I felt bad pain once from gas while at the hospital but that was it! I was up and walking a few hours after surgery.  I felt amazing! I spent the night in the hospital, had a leak test the next day and then I was sent home!  Overall I felt very positive about the whole experience!

Once I was home I was on a 2 week liquid diet which consisted of mostly protein shakes.  Everyday you have to hit a 60g protein goal.  Those 2 weeks were the hardest but I kept focus and they flew by!  During that time I had NO energy and was in bed alot but still managed to get a few walks in.  The next 2 weeks were a pureed diet which was mostly eggs, beans, soft cheeses, greek yogurt.  Needless to say I ate A LOT of eggs lol!  That was a hard two weeks as well but I did it! After 4 weeks you can move on to normal food.  That was an awesome day haha!  You still have to eat protein and low carb but being able to eat chicken and veggies was amazing!

4 Days Post Op

 My scars are very small, I have 5, you can't see the 5th, it's in my belly button!  Now, 5 weeks post op they are even better!  I feel amazing now!  I have all my energy back and I am feeling like my old self!  Well, not entirely of course! :)

I have lost a total of 46lbs and 23lbs since surgery!  I have lost even more inches! I started off as a size 22/24 and now I am in size 20!  Everyday is so great, I am not struggling at all. I have made great choices and do not miss bread or carbs at all!  I am very happy with this decision and I have no regrets! :)  I will update again soon!

I Miss You.

I miss this blog.  I miss it alot.  It used to be the best outlet for me during my weightloss journey journeys.  This blog turned 5 years old in January....and guess what?!?!

I'm still fat.

Yup, another failed attempt.  I gave it my all and was able to lose about 50lbs in 2011-2013.  I had back surgery which derailed my journey big time.  I also got a new job which totally changed my schedule and made it almost impossible to get to a gym on weekdays. I gained those 50lbs back and even an extra 20lbs, just for good measure!  Now I sit here at 331lbs  324.7lbs (I lost a few), my biggest yet.  Yay!! Go me!

...

What happened, you may ask....life happened.  I was living a very unrealistic lifestyle that made me so successful.  I was working out 5-6x a week for 2+ hours, eating the same food everyday and avoiding social functions.  The easiest way for me to explain "what happened" is to compare my journey to the shitshow known as The Biggest Loser.  I was in an environment that was controlled and made it easier for me to be successful. It wasn't realistic and as soon as my environment was altered and changed, I gained my weight back. I'm sure this story sounds all too familiar...it's pretty common.

I decided to make another change that I have been working on since May.  I will update soon with what that change is!  Until then....salads for days.

New Journey

Wow....this weightloss journey has been....normal??  That's what I will call it...normal.  We all know a weightloss journey never stops. Up and down, up and down, up and down.  Story. of. my. life.

I may be starting a new journey, and if I do, maybe I will blog about it...


....maybe.

Yumm! Shrimp Bruschetta with new olive oil!

Everyone who knows me knows that I LOVE making bruschetta!  Fresh and homemade is the best!  I have always made it with chicken but this time I decided to try something new....SHRIMP!

My "recipe" is always the same:

1 Tablespoon Olive Oil
1 Tablespoon Balsamic Vinegar
Garlic
Tomatoes
Basil
Salt
Pepper

That's it!

I love to use the heirloom tomatoes, they have the best flavor and color.  Hey, if you're going to eat it, mine as well look pretty too!  I had this new olive oil to try and it sounded so good  What better recipe to use it with than bruschetta?  It was the new Filippo Berio Robusto Olive Oil.   It was meant to have a stronger flavor than others and it did!  It was so yummy in this recipe, it really brought out the nutty flavor of the olive oil and complimented the vinegar and tomatoes perfectly.  I highly recommend!

Yum!  

I love this dish so much and I will always make it!



**Please note that I received this olive oil free for testing purposes.

Status Update

It's been awhile and I have been busy!

There was one week where I had a basketball game on Tuesday, soccer game on Wednesday, dinner plans on Thursday and a dinner party on Friday!  It was such a busy week filled with at least 3 sporting event hot dogs and a lot of poor food choices!  I was so busy that week that I didn't make it to a weight watchers meeting and I skipped a week. I ended up going the following week and weighed in 1.6lbs lighter! Not bad!

1.6lb loss!

Philadelphia Union soccer game!

I have to say that I am very lucky I didn't gain weight during that time. I did eat bad for dinner every day but I made sure to stay on point during lunch and other meals.  It was easier than I thought it would be actually. Yay!  #lifechanges

Chicken Salad and Kirby

Turkey Sandwich and Hummus

Yummy Omelet

Bruschetta Chicken

In other news....my last week didn't go as well.

My work just recently moved to New York City and I must commute into the city everyday.  Talk about a routine change!!  I wake up earlier, get home later, walk a ton and spend a lot of money. Needless to say my weigh in wasn't very good.  I ended up gaining 1lb and I'm not too upset about it. Life threw me a curve ball and weight watchers helped me deal with it.  It's ok to gain a pound as long as you try harder next week.

No worries, I got this!

Weigh In!

So to follow up on how I did regarding my last post about being worried over weekend indulgences...ummmm I kicked ass.  Yes. I. Did.

I lost 5.2lbs for a total of 9.2lbs in 2 weeks!

So many stars. Yeah baby!

Yes yes YES! I know that it comes off fast in the beginning but still, so stoked. I always second guess myself and play mind games.  I need to remember that just because I indulge in one item one day, doesn't mean my whole week is ruined.  Let's be honest...totally ate a big brownie today and I'm already freaking out about weigh in next week. IT'S OK JULIE...calm the f down.

Side note:

Had a work bbq yesterday and I did well.  I allowed myself to have 1 main item as long as I brought my own "sides."  No potato salad or chips for me!  :)  I was satisfied and proud that I made the right choices.

Large point lunch but so much better than it could have been!

I am ready to carry my positive vibes from weigh in last night into this next week.  Let's goooooo!!! :)

Weekend Hurdles

This past weekend was only my second weekend back on Weight Watchers and I did have a few obstacles to destroy.  I succeed....for the most part!

It all started on Friday night.  My boyfriend and I look forward to eating out on the weekends as a form of entertainment.  If we don't have plans, we go out to dinner.  Which is totally fine, there are a ton of healthy options when you go out and no one should be scared to do so.  I am happy to say that we went to a Chipotle like place that made my decision making easy.  Bowl with chicken, lettuce, pico, a tiiiny bit of beans, guac and cheese.  Yes....I got cheese. I had the points to spend so I spent them.  It was very good.  The part that turns bad is.....I totally went crazy on chips and queso.  The whole time I knew I shouldn't be eating this but I totally did.  There was a point where I looked at my boyfriend and said "I totally ate that whole cup of queso, didn't I?" Boooo.  As bad as it sounds I was still under my point allotment for the day.  I believe that full of cheese dinner was about 23 points.  I always estimate over what I think the serving sizes are so take the point value with a grain of salt.  I would much rather overestimate than underestimate!  So that was Friday.  I suppose that counts as a win but the scale tomorrow will be that deciding factor!

On to the disgrace known as Saturday...woof.  Friends came over and we went to the pool.  I bought some hummus and pita chips for snacks.  I also bought those crazy weird Lays chips- southern bisquits and gravy and truffle fries.  I bought those for fun so I didn't eat thaaaaat many.  I did eat a crap ton of hummus which was dumb. I should have portioned it out better.  Oh well.  For lunch we got pizza.  I had 2 slices, 1 cheese and 1 pepperoni.  I used the ww cheat sheet which says 1 cheese slice is 7 points and pepperoni is 8. After lunch of course the damn ice cream man has to come.  We all got ice cream and I got an 8 point chipwich.  No regrets there, that little bastard was good.  After the pool I came home and ate dinner which consisted of another piece of pepperoni pizza and more pita chips with hummus.  Such a terribly bad decision, wtf Julie.  Because I have no idea how much I ate through the day I rounded up on everything and over estiamted, because seriously...who knows how much I did eat! (the whole reason why I'm on ww to begin with....HELLO). I ended up closing the day with 61 points used....I had to dip into my weeklies.  BUT THAT'S OK!!! That is why they're there.  :)

That's a whole lotta points right there....yikes!

Ok...so to all of those who have been following my journey from day 1 know that I try to find a positive out of every negative.  There is def a positive to all of this!!  That is...that both Saturday and Sunday mornings were perfect.  Both mornings started out with a 5pp breakfast consisting of 1 egg, egg whites, light dry toast and fruit. That is a huge improvement and something to point out!  Another positive is that even though I ate terribly on Saturday...I was being active at the pool.  I was able to gain 3 activity points that day and that is DEF a check in the win column.  YEAH!!

The last and best positive of this post is how great I did yesterday!  I tried out two healthy meals and it was a good day!  For lunch I made tuna melts and for dinner I had portabella mushroom pizza!

So Yummy!

Lots of cheesy goodness!

Now, the tuna was easy to calculate the points and was only 4pp per slice.  I had 2 slices, pita chips and strawberries for a 12pp lunch.  It was filling and I felt like I was eating a lot of food! Dinner was great and so yummy.  Wegmans sells these portabella pizzas already made and all you have to do is cook them in the over.  They put ALOT of cheese on them so next time I am def taking some off.  According to the package it should be 8pp but just to be safe I added an extra 4 points.  Those little meatballs were turkey meatballs and were great!  Tasted very good and were 4pp for 6!  So total, including sauce, my dinner was 20pp.  That is kinda a lot but I have the points available so I mine as well use them.  I even had 12pp left over for the day (and that includes a yummy ww dessert I had).  Sunday night I also earned 3 activity points for going on a 30 minute walk.  Not much, but hey, it's something!!


So all in all it was a weekend filled with a few slip ups and damage control.  I would call it a success but only Tuesday night will tell!!!  I have to be good today and tomorrow...I can do this!

Weigh In and Weekly Recap

Yesterday was the end of my first week on weight watchers take 2! The first week went so great and I found it very easy to stay on track!  I tracked everything and never went over my daily point values. Even though I stayed on track I was still pretty nervous to weigh in.  I don't know why I was so nervous but I wanted to see a loss. I think I was just scared of the idea of staying on track and it not being good enough for a loss. I always second guess myself on everything...why wouldn't this be any different?  Geeze woman, get it together!!

So on to the weigh in...

I weighed in at 325.4lbs...a 4lb loss! Yeah baby! I'll take it.

Yay!!

I was super happy.  I was hoping for at least 2lbs and look at that, I doubled it. Short skirts are a little bit closer!! (For those of you who have been following my journey forever, you know how I always used to wear the cutest clothes?? Yeah...not anymore. Think of Morticia Adams...black on black.  All day everyday.)

I made a lot of healthy food choices and felt satisfied all week. I decreased my portions and substituted unhealthy foods for better choices.  I have been cooking more and eating out less which is amazing!

Chicken Fajitas

Egg Muffins

Dessert!!

I found it weirdly easy to be good.  I know...me good?! Haha, but I was.  I am so sick of being at this weight.  I'm not myself.  people who didn't know the old me just think I am a miserable negative person, but I'm not.  I'm just miserable and negative about my weight.  It's hard to sit back and see yourself spiraling out of control and feeling as though you can't stop it.  That was me the past year but not anymore.  I have had enough and I am ready to make this change. AGAIN. Yes again for the 100th time.  Hopefully for the last time.